New DWU union game

Damn you! Such an Awesome Weapon!Voork

Really just needed and excuse to post that picture;)

Bruno - So i hope you're good with maps of China, Sima Yi, cause i'm confused.

Sima Yi - i have all maps and locations memorized. i am a genius remember.

Bruno - wouldn't that ability count as a photographic memory?

Sima Yi - stop blubbering! we have to do something quickly to turn this into either your Mousou mode or mine. otherwise we're going to die most likely.

Bruno - well, if it's Zhen Ji's mousou maybe she'll take over the kingdom of Wei and we'll join her and both get medals and it will be a romantic ending where she marries her true love and we all make the world a better place to live.

Sima Yi - and flowers grow out of my butt crack!? lets hope not! no, i have a sinister idea of genius and cunning that will bring this story revolving around me like sun revolves around the earth!

Bruno - So i hope you're good with maps of China, Sima Yi, cause i'm confused.

Sima Yi - i have all maps and locations memorized. i am a genius remember.

Bruno - wouldn't that ability count as a photographic memory?

Sima Yi - stop blubbering! we have to do something quickly to turn this into either your Mousou mode or mine. otherwise we're going to die most likely.

Bruno - well, if it's Zhen Ji's mousou maybe she'll take over the kingdom of Wei and we'll join her and both get medals and it will be a romantic ending where she marries her true love and we all make the world a better place to live.

Sima Yi - and flowers grow out of my butt crack!? lets hope not! no, i have a sinister idea of genius and cunning that will bring this story revolving around me like sun revolves around the earth!

Bruneauinfo

Zhen Ji wont be taking over Wei anytime soon, you bartered her for security, remember? She now serves the Han.

"So much for true love! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!"

AH! mount jing..a perffect place to start battle

-mitsuhideakechi has appeared in mount jing-

now archerers release the arrows let them burn down the hans territory.

Gan Ning - I'm here, Now the fun begins!

Lu Xun - When the Brothers from Wu come the fun does indeed begin.

Zhuge Liang - The plan is falling into place....

Huang Zhong - I will lead the fire attack with my crossbow!

-mitsuhide rushes to a base near by-

charge the supply base!!!!

-the supply base has fallen to the allied forces-

ok with supplies at our side we wont have to worry of our men getting tired...everyone stay with zhuge liang and aid him..

i want 5 of my men to remain with me the rest of you like i said aid zhuge

-mits has only 5 troops with him-

Zhen Ji - It seems I'm the only one here. I may have to surrender.

Shu Officers - We have arrived!

Yuan Shao - Eh, Whats going on here?? We're surrounded!

NOW!!! realease the second fire-attack

-mitsuhides 5 men have started a fire attack-

-due to his lack of troops the fire is not strong-

Huang Zhong - Zhuge we Must go to the top of the hill!

Zhuge Liang - Yes...Lets go...

Fu Xi - I shall go too!

Nu Wa - I shall Come along also!

hahahaha...now....release the next fire attack!!!

-due to the lack of men the fire is not strong-

ok men prepare for the next fire attack...our quivers are almost empty..ok then have supply troops deliver food to zhuge and have men deliver quivers full of arrows to the people atop of the mountain..

-allied forces morale sky rocketed-

hmmm....if they dont do something the enemy shall be burned to the ground or might be even forced to retreat

supply men: yes sir right away

-supply men have been dispatched-

ok then we need a task force to take the bridge on my left down!

task force:right away!

-task force have been deployed-

Sim Yi - bwahahahaha

Bruno - what's so funny?

Sima Yi - i used Zhuge Liang's own strategies against him. he and zhou yu are no doubt going to be crying very shortly.

Bruno - you mean that cardboard cutout of Zhen Ji i made?

Sima Yi - yes.

Bruno - where'd that go?

Sima Yi - to our decoy supply base!

Bruno - but i thought i saw you take it into your tent.

Sima Yi - only temporarily. i uh.. needed to study it to make sure it was properly... proportioned and convincing.

Bruno - right....

Zhuge Liang - We must get ready for the fire attack Huang

Huang Zhong - Yes...I am ready.

Zhang Fei - Whats the Use of a task Force??? I Shall Kncok the bridge down Myself!!!

Yuan Shao - Ahh We are going to die! We must retreat!

-Yuan Shao Begins to retreat-

Gan Ning - Oh No you don't!

-Gan ning Strikes Yuan Shao Capturing him and bringing him to Base.

supply troops: ok the delivering is done!

-allied forces morale increased-

task force:now take down the bridge!

-the bridge collapsed-

mits:ok there we weont have to worry about an attack on our lef flank...

Troop 1:i love zhen ji!!!!.....um.....why aren't you talking....in that case...i will kiss you...

Troop 2: you idiot thats a cutout of zhen ji!

-allied forces morale dropped-

Alright we will take out Sima yi

-mits charges towards sima-

You Fools I shall send someone to destroy it.

Zhang Fei - Ahh Your pretty Zhen Ji!

Zhen Ji Cutout - .......

Zhang Fei - It is a fake I must destroy!

-The Cutout of Zhen Ji was destroyed

i am here

-lone..has entered te battlefield with one troop-

Meng Huo - So Yuan Shao You dare to fight us! Time to be beaten Muwahahah!

Yuan Shao - Ahhh! Ahhh! Ahhh!

Huang Zhong- Men Fire your Arrows at the Wei main Camp!!!!!!!!

-mits stops-

with my remaining arows we shall deploy another fire-attack ready, aim, fire!!!

-due to low troops the fire is not strong-

Ah lone wanderer thank you for coming...

-mits continues persuing sima-

With the fires scattered around..this land is becoming trechrous...but nevertheless we shall wait till he jin arrives keep pointing your arrows untill he arrives.

Ah renforcements! good...Voork we will be victorious...hmm....you should assist zhuge liang...it is only if voork agrees..

-with all the fires scattered the fire grew stronger-

Ah let the fire consume the enemy...

-mits is inspired due to the flames-

mits to sima: lets have an allaiance if not then i will slay you here and now!

Bruno - maybe you should make cardboard cutouts of all of our leaders so it looks like we're standing on the hill watching the battle and these guys don't go and get too confident.

Sima Yi - maybe you should make the cutouts and let me strategize. hmm... wait! if i recall in Kessen 2 we used flying wings to fly over the castle walls and storm our enemies.

Bruno - wasn't that Shu though?

Sima Yi - no. it was my idea! you should play that game again and remind yourself.

Bruno - yeah, and you were a lot cooler in that game too. what happened to your super-wizard powers? now you have Fumma ripoff gauntlets that make you look a bit...

Sima Yi -i still have super-wizard power. that's how i changed my appearance.

Bruno - yeah, Michael Jackson style. why don't you go back to the old look?

Sima Yi - because it's not going to win this battle we're fighting! now, back to the wings.

Bruno - i'll get right on cutting them out.

:Bruno is acting strangely:

Sima yi you dare ignore me?!!

-mits has commenced battle with sima yi-

Bruno - what's worng Sima Yi?

Sima Yi - in need those cutouts now! i'm being attacked by mits!

Bruno - well if el kingo, Mr Buttman were here, he'd...

Sima Yi - where are the cutouts!?

Bruno - they're not done yet. but here, i'll give you a copy of the first prototype.

Sima Yi - what's this?

Bruno - it's called a paper airplane. if you throw it at Mits...

Sima Yi - fool!! this won't help me escape! i need the wings so i can get out of here.

Bruno - here. let me do it. mits'll look just like Xiahou Dun in no time.

Sima Yi - waaaaaaa!!!!!:cry:

Bruno - and if things work out, he'll see like Xiahou Dun as well.

Xiahou Dun - yes, but will he eat his own eyeball and make a memorable quip like mine??!

Damn it sima yi get serious!!!

-mits is enraged-

Bruno your next!!! after sima!

Damn it bruno!!

-lonewanderer begun to charge bruno-

you there get ready for a fire attack you might be the only man in my army but you show courage coming with me to the battle field..

troop #1:preparing now sir!

Hmmm...I am back what have i missed. here it goes.

Gan Ning - Let us Continue to beat things out of Yuan Shao.

Lu Xun - I shall put my plan into place....Go...

Pang Tong - Pang Tong here again. Now Light the Wei base on Fire Muwahahahah!

- The Wei base has caught Fire and is Engulfed in it.-

-Wei Morale Has Gone very far down-

Zhuge Liang - Perfect as always Pang Tong, Lu Xun, We make a great strategical team.

Lu Xun - Yes....Now for the final step...

Yue Ying - Stupuid Little Han, Leaving a gaping whole in your formation is your death. Now fire those Arrows Huang While i start the fire!

Huang Zhong - Yes my lady. Now Fire!

-The Han Camp Has been set on fire-

- The Han Morale Has gone down alot-

Lu Xun - Now....

- Guan Yu and Zhang Fei have appeared in an Ambush behind the retreating Han-

Guan Yu - Did you think you could escape from your burning base that easily?

- Guan Yu and Zhang Fei Begin Easily Slaughtering all Han Soldiers and Officers -

good it seems that he jin has not apeared now me and lone will rush to their main camp!! zhuge thank you.

lone and mits are charging-

alright then ill go back to weis main camp

-mits changes destination-

Bruno - you wan't to fight.

:does Bruce Lee, fists of fury, enter the dragon, kung fu style moves with rock crusher:

:next Bruno is engulfed in a bright light:

Bruno - then a fight you will receive!!!!

Sima Yi - Bruno, you're freakin out!

Bruno - they have taken Yuan Shao! you have called for a retreat! i can't cut out paper wings fast enough! our leaders have retreated! and i'm having a very, VERY BAD DAY!!!! time to turn this on!!!!!

:Bruno transforms into...:

LUBU - OLD SCHOOL !!!

Bruno - ....lets do this.

mits to bruno: hahahahahaha you wouldnt want the real Lu Bu to see you dressed like that would you?

You have asked for it.

Gan Ning - It seems like your "Buddies" Wei Are attacking Us While we are holding you Hostage. We may have to Kill you. Would you want that?

Yuan Shao - Please!!! No!!! Retreat!!!! They Will Kill Me!

Zhuge Liang - You heard him Bruno. Leave now, Or We shall Kill Yuan Shao.

........ meanwhile at Han Zhong.......

Sentry A: Do de do do, What's up Sentry B?

Sentry B: Not much really, just, HOLY #$@%@#$%$^%$#^%#^%$#^%$#^%$^%$^ LOOK OUT!!!

A volley of arrows rips apart the men on the ramparts, and sends the inhabitants scurrying for cover. Taken totally by surprise and without any leadership available to lead the defense or detect the incoming invasion force, the city is in immediate danger of succumbing to the enemies fierce assault.

HAHAHAHAHA, what fools!! To leave their entire kingdom undefended whilst they go raid the Han, such folly! Even if they somehow turn around and get back here in time, which is highly unlikely given their current heated pursuit of Han forces, they will be eternally on the defensive from now on, never sure when our army will appear or where. Lu Bu, take the city, and kill all whom dwell within it! Dong Zhou, guard the armies rear, lest we receive......... uninvited guests. With the rest of our forces back in Qin, our position is most secure from any surprise attacks.

By your command!!

So bruno what will it be...you retreating? or you staying and we kill yuan?

scout: sir the qin empire has take over one of our cities

damn it!..ok...send a message to Lu Bu saying this..

it seems that there is someone impersanating you in the battle field....he is making you seem like a weakling...and who knows maybe diao chan might give him a kiss thinking it was really you...i say you come here and elimanate your imposter!

Messanger: R-right away!

Dammit , Good Plan jeff Sit around and wait...We left a few officers back thankfully

Zhu Rong - What is this? An Invasion? Men get to your stations! Search han Zhong For any help at all!

Soldier - All We found was this barbarian.

Wei Yan - I....Crush.....Qin...

Good Enough! Xiahua Ba And Wu Tugu Defend the Castle!

Everyone back to han zhong!!! zhuge, we will use the same strategy as in this battle

Fu xi, Nu wa,zhuge,Voork follow me i will leave some officers here i suggest the same for you onto han zhong!

-the allied forces turned back to han zhong-

Yes But Han Zhong has a small resisitance of my officers. Lu Xun I leave this up to you.

Lu Xun - You won't be disappointed in me

Gan Ning - I shall stay back also.

zhuge.. once we get there you know what to do..

DPQ should still be at hon zhong.

ah what shall we do with yuan shao? shall we offer an alliance with han for yuan ?

(The Walls breached, the defenders begin to desert, with only those of the most stout of hearts fleeing to the central plaza of the city. Lu Bu leads the ten thousand Qin Immortals into the city, men armored head to toe in heavy lamellar armor, their face hidden behind a signature silver face shaped mask meant to inspire fear into their foes. Armed with heavy one handed maces capable of crushing bone beneath even the sturdiest armor, and stout solid iron shields, they are the perfect troops for leading an assault or breaking the enemy in a decisive shock confrontation. Lu Bu's men encounter little that can stop them, as they slaughter their way to the central plaza. Faced with the rag tag survivors, Lu Bu issues a challenge......

Pathetic, even I expected you conscript scum to put up more of a fight!! Is there no one here who can hope to provide me with a challenge!!!

messenger: Lord Lu Bu, a messa-

Silence dog!! Cant you see I'm busy!!

Wei Yan - I.....Kill.....You....Scum....

-While Lu Bu is not looking , Wu Tugu Zhu Rong And Xiahua Ba Ambush Lu Bu -

Zhu Rong - A succesful Ambush, Hold Out! Our main force is almost here!

ah we are here....damn it...they have 99% of this territory captured... alright then everyone you know what to do

-allied forces are acting strangely-

Feh, pathetic. See how they fear us so men, to attempt such a cowardly tactic, in the midst of their own city. Rear ranks, turn and engage the enemy! Forward ranks, kill the scum in the plaza, then form up in the rear.

(Thanks to their superior discipline, the Qin immortals suffer only a minor hit to their moral, as they quickly adapt to the new situation. As those in the rear turn round and engage Han Zhong forces, the men, women, and children of Han Zhong still huddling in the plaza are dispatched with ruthless efficiency.)

Hmmmm, quite a clever tactic really, sacrificing the helpless population of the city as the bait for a trap. But no matter, those worthless peasants are no match for a professional fighting force, heroic leaders or no. We have reinforcements to deal with. Dong Zhou, assault the newcomers, before their men can regain their stamina spent in the long march back here!

At once! I'll squere them like pigs!! AHAHAHAHAHA, CHArge!!!

(Dong Zhou leads his men against the allied encampment.)

Zhuge:All is prepared

-something strange is going on-

ok everyone protect zhuge,ill deal with dong zhuo

-mitsuhideakechi is charging at dong zhuo-