I can't remember the last time I had a funny blog :oops: I'm still working on trying to post pictures of the kitties, but I'll try to post them sometime :D :wink: Dan Quayle was a vice president, if you didn't already know.

1. If we do not succeed, then we run the risk of failure.

2. Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is IN the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here.

3. Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.

4. What a terrible thing to have lost one's mind. Or not to have a mind at all. How true that is.

5. You all look like happy campers to me. Happy campers you are, happy campers you have been, and, as far as I am concerned, happy campers you will always be.

6. We expect them [Salvadoran officials] to work toward the elimination of human rights.

7. El Salvador is a democracy so it's not surprising that there are many voices to be heard here. Yet in my conversations with Salvadorans... I have heard a single voice.

8. I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.

9. I want to be Robin to Bush's Batman.

10. Getting [cruise missiles] more accurate so that we can have precise precision.

11. Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.

12. I have made good judgements in the Past. I have made good judgements in the Future.

13. I was known as the chief grave robber of my state.

14. We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world.

15. I stand by all the misstatements that I've made.

2 actually :shock:

My parents promised me I would get a house cat when we moved. Well, we've been living here for 5 months and I still didn't get a cat :( Yesterday, my best friend Chelsea calls us and tells us about 2 brother kittens they found in a box on the side of the street. She said they were giving them away and we were more than welcome to come take a look :D

We were only going to pick one kitten, but we couldn't separate them so we just got both :P They are so cute!!! :lol: I slept on the couch with them last night and they kept trying to climb up to sleep next to me :P

My sister named hers Skylar (he's black, gray, brown, and white) and I named mine Jinx (he's black, gray, and white) :D

I just got back from my grandparents' house. They have this cat that's getting ready to have kittens and I really wanted to pet it. I followed it to the side of the house and tried to coax it over to me. It started walking towards me when a baby bird fell out of a tree and landed near the cat. The cat pounced on it and started eating it while it was still alive......and screaming :shock: :cry: I quickly ran away and started bawling my eyes out :cry: :cry: :cry: I can't get the image and the screams out of my head! :cry: I am now permanently traumatized :cry: :cry: :cry:

I was tagged by Jeni, so here is 10 more facts about me :P

1. I went on a 5 mile bikeride early this morning.
2. I am wearing a purple shirt.
3. I'm thinking about who to tag next :P
4. I'm having difficulty coming up with 10 more facts :lol:
5. I am single once again :D
6. I'm craving M&Ms.
7. My wrist just popped.
8. I have knee troubles.
9. I accidentally just poked myself in the eye :lol:
10. I'm gratefull this list is finally done :lol: :P

I tagged AangPhantom777, XiaolinPrincess, ratlover15, gothicsweetie, Light92 :P

Happy 4th Of July!!!

I had this joke up for a few hours yesterday, but I deleted it because I wanted to do the 'tagged' thing.

7. TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

8. TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I."
ELLEN: I is...
TEACHER: No, Ellen..... Always say, "I am."
ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

9. TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
JOHNNY: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."

10. TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
JOHNNY: "Because George still had the ax in his hand."

11. TEACHER: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SAM: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

12. TEACHER: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's.
Did you copy his?
DESMOND: No, teacher, it's the same dog!

13. TEACHER: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer
interested?
PUPIL: A teacher.

I was tagged by Phantom_Girl a few days ago, but I forgot about it until a few minutes ago :lol: :oops: Anyways, onto the facts :D

1. My favorite drinks are Diet Pepsi Max and Diet Mountain Dew.
2. I'm probably the shyest person in my grade.
3. Even though I was really shy, I was the best person on the speech team :lol: That is, until I quit :oops:
4. I love astronomy and trees :D
5. I love cats! :D
6. I am terrified of spiders! :cry: I tried to kill one once, and I cried because it kept moving and I was afraid it would attack me :( :oops:
7. I can't draw to save my soul :lol:
8. I can't stand getting my picture taken :evil: I'll do whatever it takes to avoid the camera :lol:
9. I have no pets right now, but I might be getting a kitty soon :D
10. The worst fact: Zach and I have been dating for over 8 months now, but we may be breaking up on Monday :cry: For several reasons actually, but I can't talk about them here for reasons I can't explain :cry:

Five others I've tagged: AangPhantom777, cookmeup, angelmercinary, Becca331110, Miamiheatboy3

1. TEACHER: Why are you late?
WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

2. TEACHER: Cindy, why are you doing your math multiplication On the floor?
CINDY: You told me to do it without using tables!

3. TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile?"
JOHN: K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
JOHN: Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

4. TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
SARAH: H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
SARAH: Yesterday you said it's H to O!

5. TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now cla*ss who discovered America?
CLA*SS: George!

6. TEACHER: Willie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WILLIE: Me!

1. "That stain was the best fifty bucks I ever made."

2. "Have you had your shots?"

3. "If you find any fingers in there, pack 'em in ice and give us a call."

4. "It's almost dry, but you may need to wring the cushions out."

5. "It was a present to my Great Aunt Erma after her bladder surgery."

6. "It fell off a truck. At least, I figure it did, since we found it by the highway."

7. "You can have those Fritos."

8. "I once spent ten days tied to this couch."

9. "It's non-flammable, unless you really try."

10. "It should be clean, we hosed it off."

11. "Watch that spring, it gave me some nasty scars."

12. "It can even float for nearly an hour."

13. "You like the smell of beer, don't you?"

14. "It's not supposed to fold out, but it will if you push hard enough."

15. "I guess olive and orange were popular colors back then."

16. "It used to be a lot longer."

17. "You'll need the brick to keep it level, unless you've got a saw."

18. "AmVets and GoodWill wouldn't take it."

19. "Don't smoke near it."

20. "You can hardly tell where they hurled."

21. "The fire hardly touched this side."

22. "It only smells this way when it's humid."

1. There's a large red tag on it marked "Evidence".

2. The cushions begin crawling away.

3. The fabric on the back has been repaired with a "Rebel And Proud" bumper sticker.

4. The owner asks you to sign a waiver.

5. What you thought was powdered sugar from a donut appears to be moving.

6. It appears to have reached its present location by being dragged several miles on its side.

7. The owner appears to be scratching himself rather frequently.

8. The owner seems reluctant to actually sit on or touch it himself.


9. It has its own nickname.

10. More than a dozen people know its nickname.

11. More than a hundred people know its nickname from a story in the local paper.

12. Someone appears to have constucted a drink holder on the armrest with a hacksaw, a torch, and a gluegun.

13. There are mushrooms growing on the back.

14. Stuffing is protruding from bullet holes.

15. There appears to be more duct tape than vinyl on the cushions.

16. It growls when you sit on it.

17. Integral parts of its structure have been replaced with a garden hoe, a flasher barricade, and the drop gate from a railroad crossing.

18. There's a coin slot on the armrest.

19. The owner occassionally pauses to pick things off of it and taste them.

20. It appears to have been spray-painted its present color.

21. You hear scampering noises inside.

27. The owner offers to throw in a free:
+ can of Lysol
+ can of Raid
+ flyswatter
+ flea collar
+ ant trap
+ vial of penicillin

28. Under the cushions you find:
+ half a bottle of ketchup
+ empty shotgun shells
+ an entire squirrel skeleto
+ a glass eye
+ ticket stubs from the 1939 World's Fair
+ used prophylactics
+ the muffler from a '72 Dodge