I know the title sounds confusing, but after reading these you'll understand:D

1. I can't find it REALLY MEANS, it didn't fall into my outstretched hands so I'm completely clueless.
2. That's women's work REALLY MEANS, it's dirty, difficult, and thankless.
3. Will you marry me? REALLY MEANS, both my roommates have moved out, I can't find the washer, and there is no more peanut butter.
4. It's a guy thing REALLY MEANS, there is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical.
5. Can I help with dinner? REALLY MEANS, why isn't it already on the table?
6. It would take too long to explain REALLY MEANS, I have no idea how it works.
7. I'm getting more exercise lately REALLY MEANS, the batteries in the remote are dead.
8. We're going to be late REALLY MEANS, now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac.
9. Take a break, honey, you're working too hard REALLY MEANS, I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.
10. That's interesting, dear REALLY MEANS, are you still talking?
11. Honey, we don't need material things to prove our love REALLY MEANS, I forgot our anniversary again.
12. You expect too much of me REALLY MEANS, you want me to stay awake?
13. It's really a good movie REALLY MEANS, it's got guns, knives, fast cars, and really good looking women.
14. Oh don't fuss. I just cut myself. It's no big deal REALLY MEANS, I have actually severed my limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt.
15. I do help around the house REALLY MEANS, I once threw a dirty towel near the laundry basket.
16. What did I do this time? REALLY MEANS what did you catch me doing?
17. She's one of the rabid feminists REALLY MEANS she refused to make my coffee.
18. You look really good in that outfit REALLY MEANS please don't try on another outfit. I'm starving.
19. I missed you REALLY MEANS I can't find my sock drawer, the kids are hungry, and we are out of toilet paper.
20. I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are REALLY MEANS no one will ever see us alive again.
21. We share the housework REALLY MEANS I make the messes and she cleans them up.
22. I don't need to read instructions REALLY MEANS I am perfectly capable of messing it up without printed help.

I want to thank everyone for commenting on my previous blog:D It has 19 comments!:shock: That's the most I've ever had:D

In celebration, here's a quote: "Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far, didn't see him shoot across that floor."

I also want to thank everyone for expressing their concern about my knees:) It's not as bad as it sounds. I'm going to the doctor this summer to discuss the surgery (I don't think I can put it off much longer anyway) I'll let you know how it goes:D

I was going to add these earlier, but tv.com wasn't working for some reason:evil: I hate it when that happens:(

I came up with three of these:lol: See if you can guess which ones:wink:

1. Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
2. "Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness..."
3. Hand me that...uh...that uh...thingy.
4. Oh no! I just lost my Rolex!
5. Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
6. There go the lights again...
7. "Ya know, there's big money in kidneys and this guy's got two of them"
8. Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
9. Could you stop that thing from beating? It's throwing my concentration off.
10. Sterile, shmerile. The floor's clean, right?
11. What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change!?
12. This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
13. Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
14. What the hell!!??
15. Oh S**t! It's squirting at me!!!
16. I've never done this before, so I hope I'm doing this right.
17. Fire! Fire! Everyone get out!
18. Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
19. Oh, look everyone. It's lunch time.
20. The foot bone is connected to the...leg bone...
21. That's cool! Now can you make this leg twitch?
22. Hey! If you pull on this it makes a funny noise.

I finished my finals today!:D:D:D I think I did alright. I saw two of them already: I got an 'A' on my health one and a 97% on my Latin one!!!:D:D:D I'm the smartest one in my Latin class!:lol: My overall grade is a 99%:D:D

In celebration, here's a random quote/joke thingy:lol::

"I'm one of those people who laughs at a joke 3 times: Once when it's told to me, once when it's explained to me, and once five minutes later when I finally understand it."

1. Shove the stuffed animal you won earlier up your shirt and ask the attendant if pregnant people are allowed on the ride.
2. Stick a piece of tape in your ear and ask the attendant if you're allowed to listen to your tape on the ride.
3. Start screaming as soon as you get in the roller coaster car.
4. Start praying and crying hysterically as you're going up the first hill.
5. Ask the person next to you what the name of the roller coaster is and after she answers, start screaming, "What!? OH NO!! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!"
6. Ask the person next to you if they've finished the repairs for the roller coaster yet.
7. Act like the girl from Final Destination 3 and pretend to have a vision that the roller coaster is going to crash.
8. Ask the person next to you to sing you a nursery rhyme to help calm you down.
9. As soon as the ride starts say, "Wait, this isn't the carousel!"
10. Flirt with the person next to you during the whole ride.

I would write more quotes and stuff, but I have to leave now:( I'm sorry about the short post. I'll make it up to you guys tomorrow:D:D:D

I have finals tomorrow and Friday, so I thought it would be appropriate to add this:lol:

1. Leave permanent markers by the dry erase board.
2. Ask whether the first chapter will be on the test. If the teacher says no, rip the pages out of your textbook.
3. Hold up a piece of paper that says in large letters, 'CHECK YOUR FLY'
4. Address the teacher as 'Your Excellency'
5. When the professor turns on his laser pointer, scream, "Aaaaaah! My eyes!!!"
6. Stuff chalk into the chalkboard erasers.
7. Start a wave in the back row.
8. Throw pencils, erasers, markers, etc. at the teacher when they turn to write something on the board.
9. Throw pencils, erasers, markers, etc. at random students.
10. Yell loudly, "Look!" and see how many people look at you.
11. Sit in front, sniff suspiciously, and ask the teacher if he's been drinking.
12. Correct the teacher at least ten times on the pronunciation of your name, even if it's Smith. Claim that the 'i' is silent.
13. Sit in the front row reading the teacher's graduating thesis and snickering.
14. Feign and unintelligible accent and repeatedly ask, "Vet ozzle haffen dee hanvay?" Become agitated and throw a fit when the teacher can't understand you.
15. Wink at the teacher every few minutes.
16. Every few minutes, take a sheet of notebook paper, write "Signup Sheet #5" at the top, and start passing it around the room.

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

1. On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair)
2. On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
3. On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???....)
4. On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost" (but, it's just a suggestion)
5. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down!" (well...duh! A bit late, don't you think!?)
6. On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating" (and you thought???...)
7. On packaging for Rowenia iron: "Don't not iron clothes on body" (but wpuldn't this save me more time?)
8. On Boots Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication" (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head colds off those fork lifts)
9. On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness" (and I'm taking this because???)
10. On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only" (as opposed to what?)
11. On a Japanese food processor: " Not to be used for the other use" (now, somebody help me out on this. I'm a bit curious)
12. On Sainsbury Peanuts: "Warning: Contains nuts" (talk about a news flash)
13. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts" (What the heck did they think I'd do with them?)
14. On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly" (I don't blame the company. I blame the parent's for this one.)
15. On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals" (Oh my! Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

I have a new favorite song! I heard it in a movie the other day called The Perfect Body. I can only hear the first 30 seconds of it, but I ordered the CD so I'll hear the whole song soon:D:P Here's the link if you want to hear the preview:

http://us.video.aol.com/audio.mini.adp?stream=http%3A//hurl.content.loudeye.com/scripts/hurl.exe%3Fclipid%3D004438101110006070%26cid%3D600097%26hack%3D.wma&title=&logo=http%3A//cdn.digitalcity.com/dalaillama/brand_aol

I have finals on Thursday and Friday so I'll spend most of time studying, so this is going to be the longest blog post of the week:( I have other cool stuff to add, so don't worry about getting bored:P:D

1. Act like a movie star.
2. Ask someone for an autograph, pretending that you think they are Tom Cruise or Madonna (do this when the person looks nothing like the star)
3. Ask the guy next to you to hold your dentures (senior citizens only)
4. Ask the person next to you, "Are you in the witness protection program too?"
5. Bring a word of the day calendar on board with you. Read every single word aloud and attempt to use it in a sentence. Use them all incorrectly. For example: 'My you have a very irate home,' she said governessly.
6. Bring a duffel bag packed with pipe cleaners, styrofoam balls, construction paper, etc. Organize a Kraft Korner. Make a craft likeness of the person sitting next to you. Give yourself an 'F'
7. Call the stewardess 'nurse'
8. Continually offer to share your Beano.
9. Decorate. Bring a scatter rug and tiny draperies. Hang a 'Home Sweet Home' plaque on the back of the seat in front of you. Invite your fellow passengers to tea.
10. Disco dance in the aisle.
11. Don't use deoderant. 'Accidentally' stick your armpit in someone's face.
12. Explain how, one time, the plane was crashing and the oxygen masks didn't come out because they aren't really that reliable, and if the plane crashed, everyone would die.
13. Fart loudly and acted shocked; looking around to see who did it.
14. Fiddle around with the emergency exit, then ask a fellow passenger if he has a crowbar.
15. Go into the bathroom and make rude bodily noises. Come out looking refreshed.
16. Go into the bathroom, drop your pants, then come out yelling, "We're out of toilet paper! Stewardess!"
17. Go into the cockpit and ask the pilot in an obnoxious voice, "Why do they call it a cockpit?" then snort as if it's the funniest thing in the world.
18. If someone has a bad toupee, smack it off.
19. Jump up and scream, "Ahhhhh! I left the stove on!"
20. Lead a revolt against first class passengers.
21. Mess up your hair, untuck your shirt, basically look crude, and mingle with a first class passenger as if you were long-lost friends.
22. Moon passing Delta planes.
23. No matter what the meal choices are, demand Rice-A-Roni.
24. Pick your nose and pat the person next to you.
25. Pretend you're flying the plane.
26. Put on a ten foot diameter sombrero and slouch in your seat, whacking everyone in the head.
27. Ride carry on luggage down the aisle yelling 'Yeee-ha!'
28. Scream and dive under your seat for no apparent reason.
29. Continually stare at the person next to you.
30. Sing along with the songs on your IPOD.
31. Sneeze, using someone's sleeve instead of your hand to cover it.
32. "Accidentally" spill soda on the person next to you.
33. Start a hot dog stand.
34. Suddenly realize that you cannot stop singing. Become very panicky. Scrawl "Help me" on a piece of paper and hand it to the person next to you. Claw at your throat and thrash around in your seat. Never stop singing.
35. Steal a business person's laptop. Play Solitaire on it.
36. Tap on the windows saying, "Looks pretty tough." then ask someone if they have a bat you could use to test.
37. Tell your fellow passenger that you just heard the bathrooms were out of order. Then pause and say, "Did you know that peanuts are a natural diuretic?" Smile.

Reminder: This game of  'Tag' that most of you are playing is considered SPAM and you can get banned or suspended if you are caught. Please delete your posts if you participated:)

I had another creepy dream last night:roll::cry:

It started out in my high school. It was the first day of school and I was trying to find my new classes. For some reason, I was taking Dutch as a foreign language (our school doesn't even teach Dutch), but I couldn't find the classroom anywhere.

I walked down the hallways several times, but I couldn't find it. The bell was about to ring when I finally found it at the end of the hallway.

I walked into the room and was surprised to see my best friend and my sister taking the class as well. I sat down, but realized my pencil needed sharpened, so I got up and sharpened it. Before I could get my pencil sharpened, my dream switched to me standing outside the school in the pouring rain.

I looked around and saw the janitor working on a car. Why he was working on a car, I don't know, but I walked up to him and told him my locker was jammed. He looked at me, then gave me a key to open my locker. I thanked him and grabbed the key, but the dream switched again and I found myself standing in the middle of my grandma's yard.

It was pitch black outside and I couldn't see anything. The key in my hand turned into a flashlight, so I turned it on. It was then that I started to hear the crying.

I looked around (with help from the flashlight) and I saw a girl standing by the side of the garage. She looked at me, but when I walked toward her, she ran away. I started to chase her, but I kept tripping because it was so dark.

I chased her around the house and the large yard, but I couldn't see her anymore. All I heard was the crying. I thought I heard someone walking behind me, so I looked around, but I couldn't see anything.

I continued to follow the sound of the girl's crying, but I couldn't see her anymore. It was like she turned invisible or something.

Then something strange happened. My dream switched to me lying in my own bed in my own room, but the girl was there too. She was in the corner of my room crying; not looking at me. Then, this man (I think it was the one following me) was standing over my bed with a knife in his hand. The girl cried harder than ever at the same time that this guy stabbed me.

I woke up right after that:shock: That dream was very very confusing and creepy:cry:

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask, "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank open the doors, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open by themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for awhile. Then announce in horror: "You're one of them!" And back away slowly.
7. Say 'ding' at each floor.
8. Say, "I wonder what these buttons do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for awhile, then announce, "I have new socks on."
11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal phone calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person on the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you. Repeat.
15. Press the buttons and pretend they give you an electric shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16. Ask if you can push the buttons for other people, but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
18. Drop your pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone on the lift.
20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the other passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Call out "Group hug!" and enforce it.

I would love to do some of these things, but I never get on elevators if I can avoid it:( I'm very claustrophobic:cry:

I did the funniest thing last night!:lol: My sister and I were throwing this sock at each other ( don't ask why:lol: ) and when I threw it at her, it got stuck in her braces:lol::lol::lol: It was soooooo funny!!!:lol: She didn't find it funny though because she kicked me in the shin:evil: Now I have this huge bruise on my shin!!!:evil: How am I going to explain that to everyone in gym on Monday!!??:evil:

1. Start telling them about the wonderful encyclopedias you have in stock.
2. Start telling them your life story.
3. Tell them about your intense hatred for salespeople, then ask them where they live.
4. Reply to all their questions in song.
5. Ask for someone who can translate pig Latin, as you speak no other language.
6. Hand the phone to the youngest member in the house (under 5 years old)
7. As soon as they name the corporation, begin to bark endlessly.
8. Start trying to give them a psychological analysis.
9. Demand that they refer to you as Doctor Chopsticks.
10. Proudly describe what you found in your ear this morning.
11. Ask them what color underwear they're wearing today.
12. Describe your socks in detail.
13. Interrupt them repeatedly to describe the beauty of your new toaster.
14. Whiningly tell them that it is past your bedtime.
15. Midway through the conversation say, "Oh no Phil! You've done it again! I told you that knife was too sharp! Where are we gonna get the money for another funeral!?"
16. Ask them repeatedly if they believe in antelopes.
17. Refuse to answer any of their questions, as they may be one of THEM!
18. Ask them what would happen if you put a frog in the blender. Later tell them they were wrong.
19. Ask them for their phone number so that you can call them back and chat some more.
20. Burst into tears when they try to hang up and scream, "Don't leave me!!!!"
21. Tell them about the time you got stuck in the doggy door.
22. When they ask to speak to you, spend a long time trying to decide if that really is your name and after you realize it is, ask them to remind you of it occasionally.
23. Proudly explain that they are the first person that you have spoken to since your return to Earth.
24. In the middle of the conversation, start humming the Sesame Street theme song, when they try to speak, sound surprised and say, "Is someone there?"
25. Begin snoring.
26. Gleefully explain that 'they' have come for you and that you are going to a better place.

I'm going to try one of these some time:lol: I wonder what would happen if I did one of these to my sister's friends when they called....:lol:

1. Follow them around the house everywhere.
2. Moo when they say your name.
3. Run into walls.
4. Say that wearing clothes is against your religion.
5. Stand over them at four in the morning with a huge grin on your face and say "Good morning, sunshine"
6. Pluck someone's hair out and yell, "DNA!!!"
7. Wear a sticker that says, "I'm a retard"
8. Have 20 imaginary friends that talk to you all day.
9. Do what they actually tell you.
10. Jump off the roof, trying to fly.
11. Hold their hand and whisper to them, "I see dead people!"
12. At everything they say, yell "LIAR!!"
13. Tap on their door all night.

The Gummy Bear Song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14X-V-VZePo