Raven1983 / Member

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Raven1983 Blog

I didn't do it........:P

Hey Y'all.......What's going on?  How are y'all doing?

I figured you guys would want an update bout how things are at Quiznos, Hehe.  It's been four days now (wow the time is flying :roll:  :P )  and no one has reallly tought me anything.  No one tells me where anything is....I'm just sorta figuring these things out and learning on my own.  I keep getting asked if I know how to make sandwiches......obviously I don't yet.  But will anyone show me instead of get annoyed that no one's taught me yet?  of course not, why would they do that?   I guess it's up to me to learn my self......oh well, maybe I'll do that tonight.

hmm....*thinks* I need random thoughts:P Oh yeah,  I get called Kathy at QUizno's......I can see how you get Kathy out of Kathleen but last I checked I was Katie:?  Blah, this is high school all over again.....having to correct everyone on my name,well mainly my teachers anyway.  Maybe they'll get it right here the first time....I can only hope.

POTC 3 is coming out soon, THanx Steph (prettyinpink) for telling me:P   I HAFTA go see this movie...it's gonna be awesome. 

You Know You're Having A Bad Day When--

- Your horn sticks on the freeway behind 32 hell's angels.

- The worst golf player in the world wants to play you for money.

-You find your son's GI Joe dolls dressed in drag

- Your twin sister forgets your birthday

- Your 4 year old tells you it's almost impossible to flush a grapefruit down the toilet.

- You start to put up the clothes you wore from the party last night.......and there aren't any

-It costs more to fill up your car then it did to buy it

- you wake up to the soothing sounds of water.....then you remember that you just bought a waterbed

- You wake up and your braces are stuck together

-You put both contact lenses in the same eye (I've ALMOST done this one before:P )

- Your doctor tells you you're allergic to chocolate chip cookies

-You have to borrow from your visa to pay off your mastercard

- Everyone loves your drivers license picture

- You look out the window of an airplane and the goodyear blimp is gaining on you.

BYEEEE!!!! 

 

For of sugar and ice, I am made. I am made

For those of you that don't recognize that song....it's "Love Like Winter" from AFI:P I have no emails for today. I will tomorrow though, I haven't even checked my email yet. I got off work and took a shower and went straight here(that was last night of course) :P I have an announcement:) and random thoughts:P (i'm so full of random thoughts, but y'all love 'em and you know it:P :lol: )

Last night, I started going out with a great friend and who is now a great boyfriend:) His name is Reddragon9288. I love him. He's the kindest, sweetest, awesomest guy I've ever met. He's always here to listen to me and help me out and he knows that I'm always gonna be here for him:) He knows how to get me out of a bad mood and has let me see what a big help I can really be:) Thanx Peach for getting us together. I love you Red :oops: I'm so happy I got to meet you and to get to know you:)

I was up earlier then normal on my days off....I'm usualy in bed till noon to oneish. Today I was up at 11. I got my medicines i needed to get and ended up going and looking for a book that caught my eye. Yes I'm a reader. I love reading, only I like reading the books I choose to read, I hated reading school work. Wuthering Heights...worst book I had to read for a class ever *shudders* everyone failed that test. *shakes head* sorry, started drifting away there:P Anyway, this book I found is called "Every Which Way But Dead" It's about a witch bounty hunter fighting creatures at night and now she's gotta protect herself from her "dark Master". sounds spooky, but it'll be fun to read because I do most of my reading at night:P It's a nice break away from Stephen King too I guess.

While buying this book I was standing in line behind this little girl...couldn't have been anymore then 7 years old and her mom. Her and her mom were going back and forth playfully going "yes" and "no" (do you really need to geuss who was saying no:P? the girl looked back at me and told me no, I looked at her and said "Ok, I can't argue with you there" :lol: then she hugged me:P what? I thought it was cute:P

I'm so glad the world is now safe from the nasty Paris Hilton for 45 days........I would've given her longer or life just because I despise her so much...but this rant could take forever so I'm not gonna start. I'm just gonna leave it at I'm glad she's in jail.

I feel bad for Greensburg Kansas.....I'm watching bout the tornado they had. Took out the entire town:( and so far 6 are dead and 60 or 70 are injured right now. It's so sad. I wish I could go there and help them but sadly I can't......I really hope those injured are gonna be alright.

I figured out another cause for my back pain......I SLEEP like a friggin PRETZEL. all twisted and somtimes curled up. I can't sleep on my back or stomach...so I sleep on my side. I curl up in a really really small ball and then I wake up in some really odd yoga-ish position. then I can't walk when I get up:? most of y'all already know the other cause for my back hurting....stress and work. Bleh I'm in bad shape. I was gonna say that the way I sleep is comfy but it's not.....but that doesn't make too much sense does it. It's comfy when I sleep...its not when I wake up. I know of a way to crack my back but it requires someone that can pick me up...for now I'll just be cracking my neck (yeah I sleep that crooked :? ) and popping my shoulders:P

I guess that's enough random thoughts for now....hope y'all like 'em:P

I'll leave you with this last thought---Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end. Author unknown. this was found on the wall at Starbucks:p

BYEEE!!!!

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

Hey y'all...yeah late blog I know:P but I come with random things going on with me and a funny email:) :lol:

Don't mind me if I start dozing off while I type...I'm getting sleepy and is bout to go to bed:P

Sadly nothing new has gone on with me......just the same sh!t, different day. I realize though the more I watch tv, the more it scares me.....like right after ATHF (Aqua Teen Hunger Force for those of you that don't know what I'm talking bout) is a show called Shin Chan. It's odd.......very odd.:| I don't get the plot of it and the way the characters are drawn is incredibly strange. Usually I just turn on the tv and ignore it.....yeah I'm an energy waster:P That's how I ended up catching bits and peices of this show....I dunno bout it though

My tooth ache is getting pretty bad....yeah Xplode and Steph (prettyinpink) I'll get around to calling the dentis one of these days. It'll get done when I can't function because of the pain.....for now it's asprin for me. Good thing we got a big bottle of it:P YAY for that. It's also a good thing that I cut back on my intake of pop......I really do neeed to start drinking more water though.

Found out something interesting when I went to my doctor's appointment Wednesday. 2 and a half years later after being diagnosed with diabetes...the doc told me there was a class for it....you know basic knowledge of diabetes, the diet for keeping it in control, excercise. You know all the stuff I'm too lazy to get up and do. Well I kinda have to take this class now. I find it odd though that no other doctor has told me bout it before. They all just told me the same thing "you need to lose weight" "you need to get your sugar under control" "keep taking your medicines" "up this medicine". I hate sitting in the waiting room for 45 minutes (first day at the new office it was 3 hours) only to be told that over and over again.....I KNOW I need to lose weight. They've told me a million times already.

Anyway before I go to bed, here's that email as promised:) Enjoy--(and yes it's a math problem but it works:P )

Unbeleivable math problem: ( and you need a calculator for this:P )

1. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT the area code)

2. Multiply by 80

3. Add 1

4. Multiply by 250

5. Add the last four digits of your phone number

6. Add the last four digits of your phone number again

7. Subtract 250

8. Divide number by 2

Do you recognize the answer? I hope you do:) I did:P

Nighty night and BYEEEEE!!

 

Let me know that I've done wrong, when I've known this all along....

Hey y'all:P

My first day at Quizno's went pretty well.....I learned how to put lettuce on sandwiches :lol:  among a few other things.:P I think I'm gonna like it though.....I don't have to pay for any of my meals I get to eat for free up to $10 dollars every day I work.....YAY.  The sandwiches there look really good too.....I'll definitely have to try one.

 Cold Stone Creamery gave one of my mgrs at Wendys a free ice cream cake.....It was sooooooooooooo good.   I want another one. It was all red velvety and ice creamy and sprinkly....with Sprinkled covered Kit Kats on it:P

For todays funny email......    A singles ad.:P (a true one also:P )

 "SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks male companionship. Ethnicity unimportant. I'm a very good girl that LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in the back of you pick up truck, hunting, camping and fishing trips, and cozy winter nights lying in front of the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Call (404)875-6420.  I'll be Waiting...."     Ya guys wanna see her?

 

 

You sure you want to?

 

 

 

 

 

 

are you ready?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Last chance to back out.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

over 15,000 men found themselves talking to the Atlanta Humane Society :lol:

BYEEEEE!! 

 

If Jimmy Cracks corn and no one cares, then why is there a song about him?

Hey y'all, How are you?     I just figured out what's going on with my new job......I start tomorrow:)  YAY:P

I saw "chat speak" bracelets today:P   They had stuff on them like LOL, QT, GLG, NMP, BFF.....I got GLG (Good Looking Girl, hehe:D ).     it's purple and it fits me...LOL conceited, aren't I?

Since the What color Sharpie are you? quiz sucked....I found a better one.  Hope y'all like this one.

Tibetan Personality Test   This one is pretty cool.....definitely the best one I've seen so far.

 Before I make this blog as long as my last one---sorry didn't mean to :P  I honestly didn't think it'd be that long.  I'm gonna go now and let you have fun with this quiz :lol:

BYEEEE!! 

I was spinning free with a little sweet and simple numbing me.

Hey all......What's going on?

I love my car......but this time of year it's a friggin sauna. It drives me nuts sometimes......It was like that today. I thought I was gonna roast in there. at least my windows work (I usually use the AC like once a week:P depends on the breeze I get) Today there was a cool breeze so the heat didn't last long thankfully.

I need an opinion....sadly my sister is going through that phase where she thinks she knows everything. She needs to learn the difference between opinion and fact apparently. anyway We were talking about music...she thinks you can only say you like a band if you know all the songs off a cd. I say you can say you like a band and know a few songs...I say that all the time because there are bands I like that I only know a few songs from. What do you guys think?

Sorry bout that last quiz....it sucked. everyone got the same answer:? I tried to get a different color with no luck. Oh well.....I'll find a better one next time. Right now I wanted to post that poem that my friend wrote for me that I told you bout in the last blog as well too......(I wish I could write this good:P )

Much like a falling star

how when I look to the sky

so bright and blue

I'm sending this to let yu know

I'm thinking of yu and I'll never let go

I'll keep yu in my heart

As I have from the start

And from morning til night

Ill stay here with yu

Ill give u the courage to fight

If there's anything yu fear

Ill pick yu up if yu fall

Ill stay with yu if yu wish

If yu want me to Ill be with yu

and tell yu theres nothing better

becuz when Im with yu

the world is so much brighter

and the colors don't compare

to the beauty in your eyes

the sweetness in your smile

the kindness in your heart


for as long as Ive known yu

this friendship will last

Ill tell yu its true

through happiness and saddness

through heartbreaks n headaches

within dreams or as reality seems

sometimes there are things

In this life that don't seem real

In a matter of words to say how we feel

when everything around us is changeing

and yu wonder if yu are still the same

Just know that yu have changed my world

And having yu in my life

Is more then I can ask

For friendship I hear

doesnt always last

shall I cast aside what people say

cuz I beleive in a different way

no matter how far away I may be

yu will always have a friend in me

no secrets, no lies

Just love and more

And always

And forever

And we may not talk everyday

But Im thinking of yu either way

If I dont send a letter

I cud be busy

or I cud be better

better then ok

or better then

alright...

better then how I'm feeling tonight

better then how I wish yu were here

or maybe yu would say that yu cud be better

Just dont give up hope

Yu cud be my best friend

and if I send this poem to yu

Yu shud know that I wrote this just for yu

Today hasnt been the best day for me

but knowing that I have yu

makes my day so much better

and I may not send something everyday

but life sometimes gets in the way

and I wish I had more time for yu

but life is calling, so I have to go

I wrote this poem to let yu know

Im thinking of yu today

Its such a beautiful day

I'm looking up 2 the sky 

watching the clouds pass by

and I know...

your out there thinking of me

doing what you do

living your life

and the thouht makes me happy

knowing that your out there

Knowing that you care

and I hope yu send me someting back

Id rele love to hear from yu

As my thoughts of yu are great

I rele can't wait to hear from yu

cuz then Id know

that your thinking of me too

and all there is that's left to say...

I miss yu and I hope to hear from you soon




Wasn't that the sweetest?:)

I'm on my feet, I'm on the floor I'm good to go........

Hey all........What's going on?

I'm here...enjoying the rain...I love rain. and Thunderstorms.

My sister for some reason decided to get me up this morning at 11:45 after I had gone to bed at 5 a.m. Wanna know what she did........she put her dog on my chest. and he decides to start licking me before falling asleep on me:P

My friend wrote me the sweetest poem........It was beautiful. I'll have to post what he wrote one day, but he among many of my other friends sure know how to put me in a good mood:) (if you guys and gals wanna read it)

I'm hooked on Starbucks..........Hot Cocoa!!! Yeah Starbucks Hot Cocoa *hides so coffee drinker's don't throw rocks at me* it's so good though. It's all whip creamy and fudgy and hot cocoa-y. yummy now i want some more. Yeah I said.....I want hot cocoa from starbucks *realizes what I said and hides again*

Sadly I don't have any funny emails.....so I leave you with this quiz.

What color sharpie are you?

I'm an orange sharpie:P

"Hard times are some of the best times"--I didn't say this...my bottle of Mike's Hard Berry did:P 

BYEEEEEE!!!

The moral of the story is I got no choice...I must not chase the boys.

Hey everyone.....I had an interesting day today. I got smashed with a door (what else is new? :? ) Thankfully my hand saved my face. It's a little red right now so I'm expecting a pretty good size bruise tomorrow......it may happen, it may not.....I'll find out tomorrow. I'm glad it was my hand and not my face or back...I've been whacked in my back ( haha that rhymed:P ) before. It hurts:P

This is a long email but its' pretty cool....You just pick your birthday and It'll tell you what kind of tree you fell out of.

Me-- I'm a Pine Tree. I'm a peace maker. Loves agreeable company, craves peace and harmony, loves to help others, likes to write poetry, not fashion conscious, great compassion, friendly to all, falls strongly in love but will leave if betrayed or lied to, low self esteem, needs affection and reassurance. (yeah most of that is true about me:P )

 

Hope y'all like this one--

Jan 01 to Jan 11 - Fir Tree
Jan 12 to Jan 24 - Elm Tree
Jan 25 to Feb 03 - Cypress Tree

Feb 04 to Feb 08 - Poplar Tree
Feb 09 to Feb 18 - Cedar Tree
Feb 19 to Feb 28 - Pine Tree

Mar 01 to Mar 10 - Weeping Willow Tree
Mar 11 to Mar 20 - Lime Tree
Mar 21 (only) - Oak Tree
Mar 22 to Mar 31 - Hazelnut Tree

Apr 01 to Apr 10 - Rowan Tree
Apr 11 to Apr 20 - Maple Tree
Apr 21 to Apr 30 - Walnut Tree

May 01 to May 14 - Poplar Tree
May 15 to May 24 - Chestnut Tree
May 25 to Jun 03 - Ash Tree

Jun 04 to Jun 13 - Hornbeam Tree
Jun 14 to Jun 23 - Fig Tree
Jun 24 (only) - Birch Tree
Jun 25 to Jul 04 - Apple Tree

Jul 05 to Jul 14 - Fir Tree
Jul 15 to Jul 25 - Elm Tree
Jul 26 to Aug 04 - Cypress Tree

Aug 05 to Aug 13 - Poplar Tree
Aug 14 to Aug 23 - Cedar Tree
Aug 24 to Sep 02 - Pine Tree

Sep 03 to Sep 12 - Weeping Willow Tree
Sep 13 to Sep 22 - Lime Tree
Sep 23 (only) - Olive Tree
Sep 24 to Oct 03 - Hazelnut Tree

Oct 04 to Oct 13 - Rowan Tree
Oct 14 to Oct 23 - Maple Tree
Oct 24 to Nov 11 - Walnut Tree

Nov 12 to Nov 21 - Chestnut Tree
Nov 22 to Dec 01 - Ash Tree

Dec 02 to Dec 11 - Hornbeam Tree
Dec 12 to Dec 21 - Fig Tree

Dec 22 (only) - Beech Tree

Dec 23 to Jan 01 - Apple Tree

Apple Tree (Love) -- quiet and shy at times, lots of charm, appeal, and attraction, pleasant attitude, flirtatious smile, adventurous, sensitive, loyal in love, wants to love and be loved, faithful and tender partner, very generous, many talents, loves children, needs affectionate partner.

Ash Tree
(Ambition) -- extremely attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with fate, can be very egotistic, reliable, restless lover, sometimes money rules over the heart, demands attention, needs love and much emotional support.

Beech Tree
(Creative) -- has good taste, concerned about its looks, materialistic, good organization of life and career, economical, good leader, takes no unnecessary risks, reasonable, splendid lifetime companion, keen on keeping fit (diets, sports, etc.).

Birch Tree
(Inspiration) -- vivacious, attractive, elegant,friendly, unpretentious, modest, does not like anything in excess, abhors the vulgar, loves life in nature and in calm, not very passionate, full of imagination, little ambition, creates a calm and content atmosphere.

Cedar Tree
(Confidence) -- of rare strength, knows how to adapt, likes unexpected presents, of good health, not in the least shy, tends to look down on others, self-confident, a great speaker, determined, often impatient, likes to impress others, has many talents, industrious, healthy optimism, waits for the one true love, able to make quick decisions.

Chestnut Tree
(Honesty) -- of unusual stature, impressive,
Well-developed sense of justice, fun to be around, a planner, born diplomat, can be irritated easily, sensitive of others feelings, hard worker, sometimes acts superior, feels not understood at times, fiercely family oriented, very loyal in love, physically fit.

Cypress Tree
(Faithfulness) -- strong, muscular, adaptable, takes what life has to give but doesn't necessarily like it, strives to be content, optimistic, wants to be financially independent, wants love and affection, hates loneliness, passionate lover which cannot be satisfied, faithful, quick-tempered at times, can be unruly and careless, loves to
Gain knowledge, needs to be needed.

Elm Tree (Noble-mindedness) -- pleasant shape, tasteful clothes, modest demands, tends not to forgive mistakes, cheerful, likes to lead but not to obey, honest and faithful partner, likes making decisions for others, noble-minded, generous, good sense of humor, practical.

Fig Tree
(Sensibility) -- very strong minded, a bit self-willed, honest, loyal, independent, hates contradiction or arguments, hard worker when wants to be, loves life and friends, enjoys children and animals, sexually oriented, great sense of humor, has artistic talent and great intelligence.

Fir tree
(Mysterious) -- extraordinary taste, handles stress well, loves anything beautiful, stubborn, tends to care for those close to them, hard to trust others, yet a social butterfly, likes idleness and laziness after long demanding hours at work, rather modest, talented, unselfish, many friends, very reliable.

Hazelnut Tree
(Extraordinary) -- charming, sense of humor, very demanding but can also be very understanding, knows how to make a lasting impression, active fighter for social causes and politics, popular, quite moody, sexually oriented, honest, a perfectionist, has a precise sense of judgment and expects complete fairness.

Hornbeam Tree
(Good Taste) -- of cool beauty, cares for its looks and condition, good taste, is not egoistic, makes life as comfortable as possible, leads a reasonable and disciplined life, looks for kindness and acknowledgment in an emotional partner, dreams of unusual lovers, is seldom happy with its feelings, mistrusts most people, is never sure of its decisions, very conscientious.

Lime Tree
(Doubt) - intelligent, hard working, accepts what life dishes out, but not before trying to change bad circumstances into good ones, hates fighting and stress, enjoys getaway vacations, may appear tough, but is actually soft and relenting, always willing to make sacrifices for family and friends, has many talents but not always enough time to use them, great leadership qualities, is jealous at times but extremely loyal.

Maple Tree
(Independence of Mind) -- no ordinary person, full of imagination and originality, shy and reserved, ambitious, proud, self-confident, hungers for new experiences, sometimes nervous, has many complexities, good memory, learns easily, complicated love life, wants to impress.

Oak Tree
(Brave) -- robust nature, courageous, strong, unrelenting, independent, sensible, does not like change, keeps its feet on the ground, person of action.

Olive Tree
(Wisdom) -- loves sun, warmth and kind feelings, reasonable, balanced, avoids aggression and violence, tolerant, cheerful, calm, well-developed sense of justice, sensitive, empathetic, free of jealousy, loves to read and the company of sophisticated people.

Poplar Tree (Uncertainty) -- looks very decorative, talented, not very self-confident, extremely courageous if necessary, needs goodwill and pleasant surroundings, very choosy, often lonely, great animosity, great artistic nature, good organizer, tends to lean toward philosophy, reliable in any situation, takes partnership seriously.

Rowan Tree
(Sensitivity) -- full of charm, cheerful, gifted without egoism, likes to draw attention, loves life, motion, unrest, and even complications, is both dependent and independent, good taste, artistic, passionate, emotional, good company, does not forgive.

Walnut Tree
(Passion) -- unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egotistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions, spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very jealous and passionate, no compromise.

Weeping Willow
(Melancholy) - likes to be stress free, loves family life, full of hopes and dreams, attractive, very empathetic, loves anything beautiful, musically inclined, loves to travel to exotic places, restless, capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with when pressured, sometimes demanding, good intuition, suffers in love until they find that one loyal, steadfast partner; loves to make others laugh.

(for pine tree, just read mine:P )

BYEEEEE!!

If you wanted honesty, that's all you had to say........

Helloooo everyone:P   How are y'all?

 I saw the most interesting thing this morning before leaving for work... I was watching "how it's made".  They were making wicker baskets and apparently they're hand made......somehow I feel I should have known that. I wouldn't have the patience for a job like that....It looks so incredibly boring and time consuming.   The finished product comes out pretty cool though.   

This lady I work with asked me how things with my boyfriend were doing.   I looked at her and said..."what boyfriend?"  I haven't talked to him in months. I called and called and called and called and called, well you  get the idea.  I never got an answer OR a call back.  Do you know what he said to me when he shows up on MSN?  "why haven't I been calling?" :roll:  

Any way that's enough about me.......I won't keep you waiting any longer for the great emails I get:P 

 

Murphy's Lesser Known Laws:

1. Light travels faster then sound.  This is why some people appear bright till you hear them speak.

2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

3. Change is inevitable, except when it comes to vending machines

4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

6. The 50-50-90 rule: Any time you have a 50-50 chance of getting, there's always a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try pass them five or six at a time...on a hill...on a curve...in the fog.

8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like that

9. The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he'll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

12. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room. (this also applies to my face and wallls when it's dark :lol: )

13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. 

14. When you go to court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. (and to think I was ALMOST one of those 12 :P )

 

enjoy BYEEEEEE!! 

You're love for me was everything I need, The air I breathe......

Morning everyone.......wait, it's evening....oh well. morning...night....y'all now what I mean.

I've got to stop sleeping with my necklace on......the other morning I woke up and it was stabbing my shoulder. How is it doing that you ask? If you saw what it looked like then you'd get the idea. see?

Necklace

it's so pretty and thorny and it hurts but it's my favorite necklace:P I don't sleep with it on on purpose though...I forget i have it on. it's then I realize I left it on when I wake up with the thorns going into my shoulder:P :lol:

I had a complaint about work.....I was gonna complain here but I realized it could go on for days. You'd get bored and I don't wanna do that to ya...so after I post part two of "why we have kids" I'm just gonna retreat to my corner and listen to music. I think I whine too much about work anyway....even I'd get bored with it after a while.

SOOOO without further ado.....

Why We Have Kids........Part 2.

7. Elderly--While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins,
I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds.
She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age,
particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass.
As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

8. Dress up--A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning "

9. Death--While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.
The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and in the hole he goooes."

10. School--A little girl had just finished her first week of school. " I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother.
"I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

11. Bible--A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages.
Suddenly, something fell out of! the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it.
What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out.
"What have you got there, dear?" With atonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's
Adam's underwear !!!!!"

I just found out something else that's friggin hilarious........if you Mapquest New York to Paris France, Direction #24 says "Swim across the Atlantic Ocean for 3,462 miles" :lol: 

 

hope y'all enjoy that *retreats to corner with MP3 player blasting and pulls hood over head and eyes*