My girl "friend" may be pregnant

[QUOTE="_en1gma_"][QUOTE="MaddenBowler10"] She already said she will not have an abortion and I support her decision, I'm just telling her some things so things will be fine for us and that nothing has to change because of this possibility of a baby.MaddenBowler10

I want to give it a chance, I like this girl a lot and she means a lot to me and has been basically my life for a while now..no point in ditching her cuz her ex got her pregnant

I'm not even gonna barge in on the child even if he's not there, she already told me she wants to do this alone, I just told her I'll be there to help her when she needs it and that im in full support of her decisions. I just want her to realize that even though things will change, that it doesn't need to affect us in anyway since it isn't our child..even tho it willMaddenBowler10

2 months of going out

"Oh baby dont worry even if you dont wanna stay with me ill be here to help you and the kid"

"Oh how sweet, could you take care of the kid this weekend i have to go to a party"

"sure thing"

some other guys getting laid and ur sitting there like an idiot taking care of her kid

[QUOTE="Tjeremiah1988"][QUOTE="MaddenBowler10"] Why do I have to accept that? I KNOW things will change even before the baby is born, but it doesn't mean i should completely give up on her and stuff. I know she isn't going to want a relationship while she has these things to deal with, but she might appreciate that I'm gonna be there for her when she needs the help and that's always good for the future for us. No point in telling her "well ur pregnant with another guy's baby so im gonna have to leave u"

I want to give it a chance, I like this girl a lot and she means a lot to me and has been basically my life for a while now..no point in ditching her cuz her ex got her pregnant

MaddenBowler10

The desire is biological. It just seems funny that you bring up this self-control nonsense...it doesn't hold up as an argument against abortion. What world are you living in? The right environment is stable, mature parents with stable jobs. They are 18 and 19...he is going to college to have a FUTURE. Introducing a baby to his life is not exactly the right thing to do. Same with the girl. She should focus on getting an education, not on a baby. She will have many more chances to raise a baby later on...when she gets her life straight. An abortion would solve everything.

_en1gma_

[QUOTE="MaddenBowler10"][QUOTE="Tjeremiah1988"] you are sounding like trick. Help if the "father" doesnt want to be there but if he does, you leave. You planning on staying around most likely wont end well, especially if the father wants to take care of the kid. But I guess you will have to wait and see or was this already addressed?_en1gma_

[QUOTE="MaddenBowler10"][QUOTE="Tjeremiah1988"] you are sounding like trick. Help if the "father" doesnt want to be there but if he does, you leave. You planning on staying around most likely wont end well, especially if the father wants to take care of the kid. But I guess you will have to wait and see or was this already addressed?_en1gma_

[QUOTE="MaddenBowler10"][QUOTE="battlefront23"] Well regardless of the romantic involvement of the situation, be there to help even if the relationship ends. This is my own opinion, but kicking her to the curb because she's pregnant is a TERRIBLE and SELFISH thing to do. battlefront23

Wait, so she's claiming to have been pregnant for 2-3 months yet just now she missed her period?

Chick's cheatin' on ya, bud.

Wait, so she's claiming to have been pregnant for 2-3 months yet just now she missed her period?

Chick's cheatin' on ya, bud.

Theokhoth

he should be selfish for his sake, after all its in his best interest. and there is no baby yet.

Thessassin

[QUOTE="battlefront23"][QUOTE="MaddenBowler10"] The romantic involvement has always been there since the beginning, she still hasn't kicked that out of the question but she could very well be doing that by getting space between me and her in the past few weeks although she has been busy with school. I'm gonna try to talk to her one of these days and get some clearer answers on what she wants out of me instead of just assuming.Thessassin

[QUOTE="_en1gma_"]The desire is biological. It just seems funny that you bring up this self-control nonsense...it doesn't hold up as an argument against abortion. What world are you living in? The right environment is stable, mature parents with stable jobs. They are 18 and 19...he is going to college to have a FUTURE. Introducing a baby to his life is not exactly the right thing to do. Same with the girl. She should focus on getting an education, not on a baby. She will have many more chances to raise a baby later on...when she gets her life straight. An abortion would solve everything.

battlefront23

Guys, I appreciate those who are helping me and even though alot of it isn't what I want to hear. It's hard for me to just let her go and stuff, I know it's always possible we could get back together and stuff but it won't happen if she's having a child. At least not any time soon. I want to be with this girl , whether she has another guy's child or not. It's not the end of the world, and certainly not the end of my relations with her. Her focus is on whether she is pregnant, not to be with a guy right now, and to try to get done with school. My focus is to get back on track with her, which is talking to her more often and hanging out and having a good time ..you know? This pregnancy thing will get in the way if it's true, but I don't see why it should make me back away. I appreciate everyone's thoughts on this, but I already know I don't want to leave her. I'm not that type of guyMaddenBowler10

I would definitely leave her since that would make her completely different from me, but that's just me. If that's the kind of mistake you would be willing not only to forget, but you would also still be willing to marry her, or if you're the kind of guy that makes girls pregnant by mistake, then by all means stay with your soulmate. Go ahead and stay with her if that's the kind of life you want, I'm not gonna stop you... But you should ask yourself if she really is the girl for you, and I don't mean physically or romantically.

Guys, I appreciate those who are helping me and even though alot of it isn't what I want to hear. It's hard for me to just let her go and stuff, I know it's always possible we could get back together and stuff but it won't happen if she's having a child. At least not any time soon. I want to be with this girl , whether she has another guy's child or not. It's not the end of the world, and certainly not the end of my relations with her. Her focus is on whether she is pregnant, not to be with a guy right now, and to try to get done with school. My focus is to get back on track with her, which is talking to her more often and hanging out and having a good time ..you know? This pregnancy thing will get in the way if it's true, but I don't see why it should make me back away. I appreciate everyone's thoughts on this, but I already know I don't want to leave her. I'm not that type of guyMaddenBowler10

It is a matter of SHOULD she? I understand that it is possible...but the truth is that marriage exists in the first place to give the child a stable family environment to grow up in. It isn't easy, and I am not suggesting ONLY abortion. I believe she should focus on her own life before she raises another life. She just is not old enough._en1gma_

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"]

Wait, so she's claiming to have been pregnant for 2-3 months yet just now she missed her period?

Chick's cheatin' on ya, bud.

Sajedene

Yeah, but not due to periods.

I don't post often but this has really made me want to express some words. Just quit trying to be with her. You are trying to get with a girl that is not worth it IMO. She already said that she wants to do things on her own and I agree that you should be there for her during her pregnancybut as a friend only and nothing else. You are 19 and in college and Im damn 100% sure you will find someone else. There is no need to try and be with someone who obviously doesn't want to be with you. You said that you haven't seen much of her in 4 weeks because she needs space? Dude that is one of the oldest excuses a girl can give you for not wanting to be with you without trying to hurt you.

maybe some of you older peeps have some tips on what I need to know and the things i should worry and prepare myself for

MaddenBowler10

I can't believe that's what you're asking... But to answer your question, you should worry about her killing herself if she's suicidal... Why would you want to spend your life with someone who wants to kill herself? Do you want to kill youself too?

[QUOTE="battlefront23"]

[QUOTE="_en1gma_"]The desire is biological. It just seems funny that you bring up this self-control nonsense...it doesn't hold up as an argument against abortion. What world are you living in? The right environment is stable, mature parents with stable jobs. They are 18 and 19...he is going to college to have a FUTURE. Introducing a baby to his life is not exactly the right thing to do. Same with the girl. She should focus on getting an education, not on a baby. She will have many more chances to raise a baby later on...when she gets her life straight. An abortion would solve everything.

redstorm72

I don't get why adoption is completely out of the question in the current discussion.

[QUOTE="LJS9502_basic"]

[QUOTE="_en1gma_"] It is a matter of SHOULD she? I understand that it is possible...but the truth is that marriage exists in the first place to give the child a stable family environment to grow up in. It isn't easy, and I am not suggesting ONLY abortion. I believe she should focus on her own life before she raises another life. She just is not old enough._en1gma_

What's bright? Going to college, pursuing the career and life that will make you happy, being financially stable, etc. Where the hell did wealth come into this? She should have a kid when she is ready for one. Period.

_en1gma_

[QUOTE="battlefront23"][QUOTE="_en1gma_"] Yeah I know...I already proposed adoption as well. You are exactly right._en1gma_

[QUOTE="Sajedene"][QUOTE="Theokhoth"]

Wait, so she's claiming to have been pregnant for 2-3 months yet just now she missed her period?

Chick's cheatin' on ya, bud.

Theokhoth

Yeah, but not due to periods.

[QUOTE="battlefront23"][QUOTE="_en1gma_"] Yeah I know...I already proposed adoption as well. You are exactly right._en1gma_

[QUOTE="battlefront23"][QUOTE="redstorm72"] Your right, the emotional ramifications of her aborting the child and having a bright future where she can live well and take care of her future children properly will be so much worse than having the child and having to leave school and live the rest of her life in a terrible dead end job wondering what could have been._en1gma_

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"]

[QUOTE="Sajedene"] Read through the rest of the thread... pregnant women still get vaginal bleeding.Sajedene

Yeah, but not due to periods.

Through text, if somebody says "period" then I take them to mean an actual period. If her actual period stopped just recently, she hasn't been pregnant for two months.

And bleeding during pregnancy is not common at all, so I'm hardly expected to assume that it's something else when it's a condition that happens only in relatively few cases.

[QUOTE="_en1gma_"]

[QUOTE="battlefront23"] If more mothers adopted to well-deserving parents who CAN'T have children, the world would be a much happier place imo. I agree 100% about adoption.battlefront23

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"]

[QUOTE="Sajedene"] Read through the rest of the thread... pregnant women still get vaginal bleeding.Sajedene

Yeah, but not due to periods.

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"]

Wait, so she's claiming to have been pregnant for 2-3 months yet just now she missed her period?

Chick's cheatin' on ya, bud.

Sajedene

Didn't tc say it was actual periods , not just vaginal bleeding. If so shes been cheating.

[QUOTE="Sajedene"][QUOTE="Theokhoth"]

Yeah, but not due to periods.

LJS9502_basic

[QUOTE="battlefront23"][QUOTE="_en1gma_"] The problem is that you can never know 100% that the the parents will raise the kid well, but it is still a good option.

bobaban

[QUOTE="Sajedene"][QUOTE="Theokhoth"]

Wait, so she's claiming to have been pregnant for 2-3 months yet just now she missed her period?

Chick's cheatin' on ya, bud.

EvilSteveo

Didn't tc say it was actual periods , not just vaginal bleeding. If so shes been cheating.