Entering the portal I feel consumed with memories of the past. I am pulled into unconscious thinking only of her. It had been so long that I even mentioned her name or thought of her face. I still remember when it was in her name that I was fighting, and slowly I started forgetting everything. This war meant so much to me that everything that I ever loved and cared about slipped away from me like it meant nothing, I brought this upon myself.
The portal leaves me on foreign soil. I look around to see them all around me, they seem to not notice me, I should take advantage of this. Then as I am about to attack a lightning strike hits the ground in front of me and a pair of swords is presented to me. I grabbed them and in a fit of rage I attack. With the many years of war I have endured I am a killing machine capable of slaughtering without thinking before I act. Body parts fly everywhere as I am slicing enemies in mid air hitting a body part with every passing move of each sword. I drop to find that there are more popping up everywhere and they now know my presence. They are dark with an evil look staring at me. I have to keep fighting.

This time it will be different, I have to win, for the sake of her.

With the acceptance of fighting this new war I was lifted off the ground. A shining light was surrounding me, filling me with a new sensation. I had thought the voice had left but I was wrong, the voice spoke once more, "Now that you have decided to join us you must know what you will be up against. This new enemy that you will face is unlike anything you will have ever known. They are ruthless, they have no mercy and don't believe in innocent. They do not rest, and they will take advantage of the fact that you must rest. Take this power, and your faith and lead the way to our victory." And with those words spoken the light that surrounded me got a little brighter and finally rushed into me spreading it's warmth and power all around me, I felt nothing like this. The rush of power lasted several minutes and I was finally brought back to the ground where I was gently placed back on my feet. I gazed down at my hands to see a glowing aurora all around me. I walked forward as a portal opened to the battle I must face. And so it begins.

Finally the war is over and I have died. As I float to the great unknown I look down upon the destruction, and see the site that had been plagued for many a years. All the bodies and blood puddles are enough to make even the strongest person get sick. The air is thick up here, it is a little hard to breath. I gaze at the stars, something I haven't looked at in beauty in a very long time. I reach the top and someone is waiting for me. No one is here but you can feel their presence, kind of like knowing when someone is staring at you. Finally I hear a females voice, "you finally made your way to me haven't you?". I pause to think about what they had said, I then respond with, "who are you?". I get no answer for a few seconds then I hear the voice again, "All you have to do is listen. I have called upon you early for a reason. A great war is breaking out and we need your help. You have no choice you must help or we will send you back to fight your old war for eternity. But if you accept my invitation I will grant you a great power that you have never known."
This new information scrambles into my mind. I thought I was rid of all this mercy, but I was only summoned to fight a different war. I drop to my knees only to shed a small tear. I ask the voice, why me, isn't there anyone else that can fight this war for you? After a few minutes goes by, I realize the I will not be given a response. The thought of fighting again was too much for me to think about, so instead of thinking it over I just accept and hope that this new war doesn't last as long as the one I just got done losing.

I fight a war! The battle front is weak and the enemy is strong, making my tries at beating this impossible. Why can't I get help? Isn't there anyone out there willing to lend a hand for their fellow man, maybe it would help if I asked or maybe my ignorance is getting the best of me. With each day my soldiers are beginning to fold as I have already lost. Confusion sets in and my world is no longer my own. I am lost. With no where to go I continue to fight this losing war only to try to escape reality. All I want to do is scream, so maybe someone may hear me but that won't help me now. Still I fight, fight until my last breath has been lifted from my body and my soul will be free.

Alright this is going to be my first rant on an issue that has been roaming through my mind for the past few days. The issue that has been on my mind is on people blaming everything on certain games. I know this issue has been done to death but I keep hearing some people agreeing with the people who want to ban them. My first issue is on making some game adult only because they have blood, gore, and maybe some sexual content. Let me just use Grand Theft Auto as an example, so basically if I were an 18 year old I would be able to smoke, enlist into the military which would allow me to do much more than any game can over, look at porn but I won't be able to play GTA?! That doesn't make any sense. I see more movies out that have extreme violence, horrible adult humor, and a lot of cursing yet they are rated R, the exact same rating as Mature or M. Then I hear that games desensitise or minds making death not that big of a deal, well guess what movies were acting out murder a long time ago, and I don't see anyone saying that a certain movie should be banned because it showed blood, nudity, and violence. You know why everyone is pointing the finger at video games? Because it is easier to dish out the blame rather than taking it. And before anyone says that I don't care about a little kid playing a violent game and then acting it out, I just have this to say. I do care, I am glad we have that rating system, and I don't want some nine year old playing God of War or Grand Theft Auto. Little kids need to be playing Yu Gi Oh or Pokemon, not playing a game where you can kill someone ten different ways. You see the rating system was designed for games such as Mortal Kombat and GTA, but yet we still hear all sorts of crap about bumping some of these game to AO or banning them completely.

Now for the blame game. I hear more parents than anyone else talk about banning certain games and you know what I have to say about that. Maybe these parents should be watching what their kids are playing rather than complain about it. You see we have this thing called responsibility and all parents have that, just because you don't think you have time to look after your kids doesn't mean anything to me, because in my world the kids come first not the job not the house but your kids. It is a parents duty to march into their kids room and look for all the porn, mature rated video games and other adult items they need to find. Your kids live in your house meaning whatever you say goes, try using some authority. Because the next time I hear my son was playing GTA and I find out that their kid is ten years old I will personally slap that person and make sure that they know why they were slapped. Oh and then we have these self righteous, I haven't done anything wrong, government officials that get up on their high horse and also blame the gaming industry, and to be honest I believe they are the once who started this, parents should help out with the ban, talk. These politicians don't care about your kids future, nor do they care about anyone elses future; all they want is to be reelected for a few more years. Why? Because they are greedy and they know how to talk out of their butts so well that everyone believes them.

I know this topic will never go away, well until something even worse comes out. But it just irritates me to no end on some of this parents that will complain over a video game that their kid isn't supposed to be playing in the first place. And what make me even more anger is the fact that most of these parents are buying the games for the kids. I mean come on, where is the common sense people? I know we have stupid people in the world but I didn't know we had so many.

As I was at work the other day, I got to thinking about what it would be like to be in the gaming industry. I thought I am pretty sure I will start off as a game tester and even though that sounds awesome I had a thought, with all the decent games out there, there will always be a crappy game out there as well. I have read around the Internet on being a game tester and they have to test a game months at a time. I always thought to myself play a game for a week or two and that would be it, no you have to explore every little aspect of the game regardless how shi*** the game is. If I do become a game tester for my internship I will still except it with open arms but I won't go in thinking that it will be a piece of cake either. I mean think about it for a second, you love to game and you wish you could do it all day long, well what once was your passion now becomes your curse with all the horrible barbie games out there. I think what I really want to do is play games for a magazine or for a television network, see there they play the game to completion only to give a review, no looking for bugs or misspellings in the menu just try to complete the game to tell everyone else on how awesome or how horrible the game was. Well either that or help design games and maybe help with the story as well. Either way I know with out a shadow of a doubt that I was meant to be in the gaming industry.

On other news I started playing GTA SA yesterday and wow, there is so much you can do in this game. I customized my character to look like this guy I once knew at work, this guy is crazy and so is my character. I have only played it a little over a day and already I have been arrested 20 times, killed 3 times, stole a plane and was shot down by the military, over 60 fools got a cap busted in they a** for talking back to me, and got lost in the woods. I have a good feeling about this game, and if the game play wasn't enough the soundtrack owns my soul, well it shares my soul with the boyhitscar cd that originally owned it. I can't wait until I can sky dive and the other two islands are opened up.

After a long few days of gaming I finally beat God of War. Just beat it about 10 minutes ago, and right now another game is bumped from my ten greatest games I have ever played and God of War is now one of the top ten. The game seemed a bit like Devil May Cry hack and slash mixed with Indiana Jones puzzle solving. I had never played a game with so much blood and nudity before in my life, every cut scene had about 40 gallons of blood in it or was showing some females breast.. GoW had some of the best graphics, beside Final Fantasy, I have ever seen and the game kept you in the story the entire time. Where else can you have sex with two woman via a PS2 controller, and find Pandora's box? I would say more about the game but I don't want to give too much away for the people who haven't played it yet. So now I am going for GTA SA, so this should take me a very long time.

It seems as if everything is falling apart at gamespot, or at least at OT 2, and one person is catching a lot of crap along the way. Well I decided to dedicate this entire journal entry to that person. Adriana this is the list of why gamespot wouldn't be the same without you.

1. Because you always seem to make friends no matter what the topic is.
2. You try to get everyone to participate in all the action that is OT 2.
3. Picking you to be the administrator of a UCB apparently wasn't a hard decision when they were given you as a choice.
4. Even though people try to start s*** with you you keep your calm, which is more than I can say about myself if I were given the same situation.
5. Knowing that no matter what happens, I know that OT 2 will always be open. Unlike some UCB boards that have came and flopped in the matter of weeks or months.
6. I have no doubt that if you were to leave gamespot, OT 2 would never be the same, and to tell you the truth I probably wouldn't hang around if you weren't around.
7. You don't see OT 2 as yours but as everyone's board, and to me that is what makes a great administrator.

If anyone reads this and would like to add something that I may not have mentioned, please by all means tell me, I don't want to leave anything out.

And now I leave you with a picture. (wish they were real, but good enough)

Wow gamespot is is sinking deeper into complete chaos. Noobs are running wild wth scissors and pooing all over the place. A few are sending PMs to people with the notion of getting attention, while only making themselves look like idiots. When will people learn that this is only a Internet forum. Even though I wasn't here through most of it, I still see the bitterness that was left behind. If you think about it, it is kind of funny, people getting all upset over a forum :lol: Well lets hope that this place gets back to normal so Dri can have stop growing those grey hairs.:lol:

In other news my sickness is gone and my gameing fingers are in max condition. I started Musashi today and so far it isn't all that fun but I still go along with my code and will continue to play the game for at least two hours before deciding to give up on it. Then after that I think I will play God of War, I hear GoW is complete owange but I guess I will have to see for myself.

This is actually funny, well not to me but to everyone else. In my last journal entry I listed all the games I got. Well something happened that hasn't happened since High school, I got a dizzy spell. I think I can blame it on a ear infection, but who knows, it is probably the Video Game god trying to tell me to stop. Either way I won't be playing those games until the dizziness goes away, hopefully it won't be too long. This is even better though, I have medication for this crappy feeling, and it make me so tired that I am unable to do anything while taking the medication, and I sleep sometimes over 14 hours meaning that I will have a head ache and my back will hurt when I get up. *gets in Platoon stance* "Why God, Why?!!!"
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